Find Peace in Challenging the Fear

This week I attended one day of the Colorado Advocacy In Action conference. The end of the day offered optional “Self Care Activities” that included your choice of a Betty Ford Alpine Garden Tour, Yoga, Healthrhythms Drumming, or Group Art Therapy. If you didn't want to choose one of these, they suggested you take a dip in the pool, soak in the hot tub, take a nap, hike, shop…..They made it very difficult to not participate in some activity that would take care of ME. My choice was a no-brainer.

I have been a yoga instructor before and after an ankle injury had to take some time off. Well, like many folks, I never resumed my practice after the ankle healed for any number of reasons. This invitation to participate in a yoga class was going to be the catalyst I needed to get back on the horse, so to speak, and resume a yoga practice. Even though I knew I wouldn't be as flexible or capable as before, I at least knew enough to feel like I could have some level of success. Basically, I was simply going to join an activity that was familiar. I convinced myself this was going to be challenging to some degree; not much, but some. In preparing to head out for the conference, I dressed for yoga, packed my mat and water bottle and away I went secretly looking forward to my predetermined success.

As the saying goes, ‘a funny thing happened on the way to the forum.’ I found myself in my first workshop with an art therapist who strongly reminded me of my very best friend from high school and immediately made me feel like she was trustworthy. (Not an easy thing for me, to be sure!) We participated in the class activity but didn't really share anything more than that. I went to my next session. Then it was time to find a seat for lunch and listen to the keynote speaker before the afternoon sessions began.

As I was attending the conference alone, I picked an empty table ready and willing to welcome anyone else looking for a place to sit and new people to meet. Low and behold, this person who had immediately fostered a sense of trust came to sit at my table. We began talking, and I asked her if she was leading the art therapy workshop being offered as part of the self care activities. Yes, she was. I began to explain how bad personal school experiences and comments from art teachers led me to believe “I have no musical or artistic abilities.” – A statement I have been saying (and believing) about myself for many, many years and my reason for not choosing her session.

She reassured me that I would only need the skill, interest and excitement of a preschooler to be able to successfully participate. While she was stating this conviction, she was also using her hand on her sleeve to demonstrate brushing off this negative memory that led to such a negative self concept. I instantly got her message and signaled so by whispering, “Well, I do have vision. I just don’t have good execution.”

Whatever quality she possessed to garner my instant trust earlier was again at work as I was quickly deciding to change my activity choice. She made me feel like I could step out of my comfort zone and be ok; perhaps even enjoy it some! So there I was later in the day, one of the first participants in the room ready to prove that even though

Finding Peace in My Challenge

I doubted my ability

I was willing to believe what skills I had were enough to succeed at some level

I opened myself up to the challenge to step outside what I knew; my comfort zone.

Truth be told, I felt empowered to slough off the weight of my past experiences and found peace with whatever I could produce regardless of how it compared to those with more obvious ‘talent’ than myself. I enjoyed it and was truly grateful that I made the less comfortable choice.


As I drove home (proudly carrying my work of art with me), I realized what a parody this was to the challenge many parents face when struggling with the idea of talking to their kids about sex! How difficult many parents must find it to

Step out of your comfort zones

Slough off the after effects of your own experiences regarding sex talks (or lack thereof)

Be ok with not having all the answers

Enter in to an honest, truthful discussion with their own child(ren)

How bad could it be to risk a little bit of apprehension and discomfort in order to address something as important as your own child’s sexual health? Find peace in your willingness to step out of your comfort zone. Find peace in what knowledge you do have. Find peace in knowing you’re creating an avenue for shared discovery, understanding and love. Find peace and challenge your fear! Chances are it won’t be as painful as you led yourself to believe. Chances are both you and your child will be grateful you did.